Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Father For Sale

SWM seeks new family because we don't want him anymore.

Enjoys solitary drives, NASCAR, the Dixie Chicks, and alternating between abusing and neglecting his children.

Bald, fat, and lazy, he'd do best in a home where no one ever depends on him, because when he finally shows up after an unexplained 5 day absence, he makes promises just to break them.

Comes with plenty of baggage but no assets besides the money he stole from his daughter's piggy bank. Uncommunicative and lacking a sense of humour, he's best suited to a woman with extremely low expectations. Loyal like a leach.

Priced for quick sale; his expiration date is fast approaching.